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Crossovers on Crack

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Ed versus Angel Chapters Seven, Eight, and Nine [Aug. 4th, 2005|08:59 am]
Crossovers on Crack

ed_vs_angel

[koryos]
[Holy crap |accomplishedaccomplished]

Crossover: Fullmetal Alchemist/Angel
Genre: Crack/Fluff
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Gore, and... that's about it

Ed vs Angel Chapter 7


Angel, while looking for a real, non-whole grain engagement ring for Ed in a jewelry store, suddenly spots someone looking at something shiny. When they move away, he pounces.

Angel: How much is THAT piece of fabulousness?

Shopowner: I’m off duty, so just take it and get the hell out!

Angel excitedly takes the talisman back to Ed, while a mysterious demon begins to cackle in the background.

Ed: What? Why are you so excited?

Angel: Look what I got for you, snookums!!

Ed: A rock?

Angel: No, silly it’s a talisman!

Ed: …it’s a fancy rock.

Angel: *glare*

Angel: I just wanted to get you something nice, THAT’S ALL!

Ed: Wait… could this be… THE PHILOSOPHER’S STONE? *snatches*

Angel: Okay fine, DON’T EVEN THANK ME!

Ed: *examining rock* Well, it's not covered in the blood of countless innocents... damn. It can't be the Stone.

Spike: I’ll go get some of that blood, mind joining me?

Ed: Um, no.

Angel: I’m on a low-fat diet, but thanks.

Envy: I don’t drink blood, but I’ll help you slaughter them!

Envy: I bet I can kill everyone better!

Envy: I can kill everyone better than you!

Music starts in the background.

Spike: No you can’t

Envy: Yes I can

Spike: No you can’t

Envy: Yes I can YES I CAN!

Spike: Anyone you can kill I can kill greater

Spike: Sooner or later they’re deader than you

Envy: No they’re not

Spike: Yes they are

Envy: No they’re not

Spike: Yes, they are

Envy: No they’re not!

Spike: Yes they are YES THEY ARE!

Spike: I can kill a bird, before her scream is heard

Envy: I can get a chibi, quicker than a ninny

Spike: I can live on pigs’ blood!

Envy: And only on that?

Spike: Yeah

Envy: So what?

Envy: Any scream you can cause, I can cause higher!

Envy: I can make my victims scream higher than yours.

Spike: No you can’t *kills random person who screams*

Envy: Yes I can *kills person who screams higher*

Spike: No you can’t! *kills person who screams higher-er*

Envy: Yes I can! *kills even higher screamer*

Spike: No you CAN’T! *kills a higher screamer*

Envy: Yes I CAAAAN! *slaps Spike’s ass*

Spike: *screams extremely high*

Spike: Yes you caaaaan…

Spike: Any wound you inflict, I inflict greater

Spike: I inflict every wound better than you

Envy: No you can’t *stabs Stu*

Spike: Yes I can *mutilates Billy*

Envy: No you can’t! *guts Stu*

Spike: Yes I can! *flays Billy*

Envy: No you CAN’T! *cannibalizes Stu*

Spike: Hey, that’s not really a wound!

Spike: I can drink my liquor faster than a flicker

Envy: I can drink it quicker, and get even sicker!

Spike: (That’s better?)

Spike: I can get on Angel’s nerves

Envy: Without getting slapped?

Spike: *pause* No

Envy: That’s what I thought, you flirt~

Spike: I can jump a hurdle

Envy: I can wear a girdle!

Spike: I can knit a sweater *knitting sweater for Angel*

Envy: I can fill it better! *is wearing shirt that says, ‘I Love Shrimp’*

Spike: I can do most anything!

Envy: Can you bake a pie? *holding pie*

Spike: …no…

Envy: Neither can I…

*Angel’s head randomly pops out of the pie*

Envy: (…the hell?)

Spike: (O…o)

Envy: Anyone you can traumatize, I can make scareder

Envy: I can scare anyone better than you

Spike: No you can’t *vamps out*

Envy: Yes I can *turns into Chihuahua*

Spike: No you can’t! *proceeds to make out with Angel*

Envy: Yes I can! *turns into Roy and smooches Ed*

Spike: NO YOU CAN’T! *somehow turns into a girl*

Suddenly, the music stops

Envy: Aww, I do prefer men~ *Envy laugh*

Spike: Whoa, anything but that!!

All others: *silence*

Envy: …was I just… singing?

Spike: Was I just singing?

Ed: Yes… yes you were.

Angel: And may I say that it was just mahvelous!

*crickets chirp*

Envy: But I didn’t mean to start singing!

Spike: Well, neither did I!

Roy: Perhaps something foul is afoot…

Wes: Perhaps.

Ed: And why am I still holding this rock…?

Angel: TALISMAN!

Randomly singing and dancing people go by

Angel tries to join in, restrained by Cordy and Doyle


Ed: It looks like other people are being effected too…

Wes: It’s like we’re all in one big musical or something.

All: …

2: HA! See what we did there? We inserted a *not* special!

1: We did?

Roy: What could be causing this?

Angel: MIDGETS!

Ed: WHO ARE YOU CALLING A MICROBIOLOGIST’S DREAM COME TRUE?!

Angel: Nothing… *whistles*

Ed: Grr argh!

Soft music starts

Ed: Don’t mock me

Every day is so wonderful

And suddenly, it’s hard to see

Now and then, I get insecure

From all the metal, I’m so ashamed

I AM NOT SHORT~ no matter what they say

Words can’t bring me down

I am normal-sized, in every single way

Yes words can’t bring me down

So don’t you bring me down todaaaay…


Angel: *so moved, he bursts into tears*

Ed: WTF?

Angel: That was… BEAUTIFUL!!

Envy: Nuh uh, I can sing better than you!

Envy: Geh! *claps hands over mouth*

Wes: Look, why don’t we all try to calm down!

Ed: Easy for you to say, you haven’t suddenly burst into song!

Wes: Well, it’s bound to happen sooner or later…

*hears the rising music*

Wes: Crap.

Wes: Why can’t we calm down?

Why can’t we calm down?

Why can’t we calm down?

Why can’t we calm down?

I know we’re under pressure

This is a problem of great measure

Why can’t we calm down?


Roy: Odd, I didn’t know you could sing.

Wes: *sweatdrop*

Ed: We’ve gotta do something before Roy sings…

Roy: …

The talisman begins to glow randomly.

Ed: Gah! The rock is glowing!

Angel: FOR THE LAST TIME, TALISMAN!

Ed: Huh? You say something?

Angel: *tears out his eye sockets*

Spike: Why am I turned on by eyeless Angel?

Envy: I’d answer that, but I think most of you would prefer not to hear.

All: *nod*

Suddenly, the rock- talisman- begins to hover in midair.

All: *GASP*

The rock flies away, passing a giant muffin.

Demon: *appears* BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

All: …

Demon: You’re right, that was too much.

Roy: And you are…?

Demon: *sings* I’m the heart of swing, I’m the twist and shout!

When you gotta sing, you gotta let it out!

You call me and I come a-runnin’

I turn the music on

I bring the fun in

Now we’re partying

That’s what it’s all about!


Envy: So you’re the one that made this happen!

Demon: Uh, yeah.

Wes: So, what are you exactly?

Demon: I go by many names.

Wes: Uh, I didn’t ask you that.

Demon: Uh, riiight.

Wes: *eye twitch*

Roy: I think what he means to ask is…

Roy: *takes deep breath*

All: *tense*

Roy: Why are you causing us all to sing?

Ed: …you didn’t burst into song.

Roy: I don’t sing.

Demon: Why am I making you all sing? I’ll tell you why…

Demon: *to Roy* Come closer…

Roy: I’d prefer to remain a professional distance, thanks.

Demon: Fine, stay where you are.

Demon: I’m making you sing because…

Demon: I’M EVIL! DUUUUUH!!

All: . . .

Demon: Also, I’m here to retrieve my queen.

All: *gasp*

Ed: No women here… oh wait…

All: *look at Angel*

Angel: ME?!

Demon: Yes, YOU!

Demon: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

All: . . .

Demon: Yes, that was probably too much.

Angel: *screams*

Angel: Wait…

Angel: *sings* Well, I want to be queen

But then I think about my scene

I hold my *cough* hair back as I scream

I don’t really wanna be the queen!


Demon: But you must!!

Angel: Why?!

Demon: Because it is you who summoned me here!

All: WTF?!

Angel: I did no such thing!

Demon: *points to talisman* LOOK!!

Talisman: *glows*

All: *stare*

Demon: *smacks self* That’s my talisman!

Ed: What, that rock?

Angel: It was my rock for you!

Angel: Never knew I could feel like this

Ed: (Like what?)

Like I’ve never tasted blood before…

Ed: (Like WHAT?)

I want to vanish inside your kiss

Ed: (OMFG get back!)

Every day I’m loving you more than this *points to Wes*

Wes: (Sulks)

Listen to my heart, can you hear how it doesn’t beat?

Ed: (True.)

But it’s telling me to give you bread to eat

Ed: (…I don’t mind that.)

My face will not change, I’m forever young.

My face will not change, I’m forever young.

But I’ll love you when you’re old and gray…

Ed: (Crap, sentimentality!)


All: Come what maaaay!

All: We’re still gaaaaaaay!


Angel: I will love you… until your dying day…


Ed: Suddenly the world seems such a scary place

Angel: (Why, snook-ums?)

Especially when you do that, and I look upon your face

Angel: (*begins to cry*)

Suddenly my life seems such a waste

Angel: (I only tried to make you happy!)

It all revolves around you

Whether I like it or not

Angel: (*sobs*)

And there’s no mountain too high

No river too wide

Sing out this song and I’ll be (unwittingly) by your side

Angel: (*sniff* You will?)

(UNWITTINGLY!)

Angel: (aww)

Storm clouds may gather

And stars may collide

But I’ll (UNWITTINGLY) love you until my dying day…

Angel: (AWWW! *hugs Ed*)


All: Come what maaaaay…

All: We’re still gaaaaaaay!


Ed: I will *cringe* love you until my dying day…


Angel: *silly giggle*

Oh come what may…

Angel: *still holding Ed* I’m still gaaaaay

I will love you


Ed: I will *gulp* love you


Both: Until the end of time…



Ed: NOW GET THE HELL OFF ME!!

Angel: I’ll never let go, Ed!

2: *snicker*

1: References…

Angel: *drop* Oops…

Demon: Well, that’s all fine and dandy but you still have to be my queen.

Ed: TAKE HIM! TAKE HIM!

Angel: NOOO!!

Demon: Well, it’s too late to stop me now!! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Suddenly, in comes…

A SEVEN-FOOT TALL SUIT OF ARMOR!!


Al: *sees Ed* BIG BROTHER!

Ed: BABY BROTHER!!

They embrace in a brotherly manner

Buffy people: *stare*

Ed: Al, how did you get here?

Al: Duh, niisan, I came through the dimensional portal.

Ed: …oh. Right.

Angel: Sweetie, who is this?

Ed: This is my little brother, Alphonse!

Demon: And why is he ruining my plans?!

Al: I followed you here!

Demon: GAH! Just let me take the queer and get out of here!

Al: Queer? What do you mean? He looks normal to me.

Al: *shines with childish innocence*

Spike: Believe us when we say he’s not.

Ed: Al, did mom ever give you… that talk?

Al: Of course! Mama talked to me lots of times, niisan!

Ed: *sweatdrop*

Demon: I’m sick of this! *grabs Angel*

Angel: HEY! I THINK I KNOW WHO THE REAL QUEEN IS!!

All: Huh?

Angel: There was someone looking at the talisman before me!!

All: *GASP* WHO?

A masked figure comes in.

Figure: It was… *pulls off mask*

Buffy: MEEEEEEEE!!

All: …

Buffy: You’re right, that was too much.

Buffy: What, I can’t be evil once and a while?

Demon: Well, in that case *drops Angel*

Angel falls into Ed’s arms

Ed: *collapses under the weight*

Demon: Looks like you’re coming with me, sister!

Buffy: Hey! What the hell?

Demon: *disappears into a portal with Buffy, cackling madly*

Envy: Well, that’s the end of that.

Wes: Yeah.

*silence*

Al: You never explained what he meant by queer, niisan.

Ed: Um…

DUN DUN DUN.

ASTOUNDING! Spike and Envy sing?! Angel is a QUEEN? Dimensional portals are a safe mode of travel? Al needs to hear the birds and the bees? ANGEL AND ED DECLARE THEIR UNDYING LOVE?

AND, WHERE ARE THE SQUIRRELS KEEPING OUR BRAINS?


Crossover: FMA/Ats
Genre: Crack/Slash/Fluff
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Rather strong innuendo, sacrifices, drug abuse

Ed vs Angel Chapter 8


Al: What did you mean by queer, niisan?

Ed: Um… Look! A kitten!

Al: WHERE? *runs off*

Spike: Look, why don’t you just tell him? You don’t want him to find out in some other way, do you?

Spike gives Ed buggy eyes

Authoress 2: GREEN DAY!!!

Authoress 1: Foreshadowing…

Ed: I can’t! He’ll be traumatized for life!

Angel: *walks over* Hello, sweetie!

Ed: *pales*

Angel: Guess what today is, Ed-sweetums?

Ed: The day I get my restraining order?

Angel: No silly, it’s our one-year anniversary!

Ed: WHAT?

Ed: YOU’VE ONLY STALKED ME FOR THREE DAYS!

Angel: I know, it seems like only yesterday I sang my undying love for you.

Ed: You idiot! That was yesterday!

Angel: PUCKER UP, SNOOKUMS!

SMOOCH

Al: *returns* Niisan, I didn’t see any- HOLY SHIT!

Ed: *struggles* Gmmmmph!!

Suddenly, Angel breaks away and begins to stumble. Suspiciously, it begins to rain.

All: *stare*

Angel: E- ED!

Ed: *scared*

Spike: Oh bollocks.

Roy: He seems to be having a seizure.

Doyle: That would be ME!

Nobody pays attention to Doyle.

Angel: I’M ALIIIVE!!

All: . . .

Spike: This is bad.

All: What?

Spike: He is….

Angelus: I’m BACK! Angelus is back, baby!

Wesley: Oh shit.

Al: Can we go back to the part where he KISSED MY BROTHER?

Angelus: WTF? I’m not gay!

All: Yes, yes you are.

Angelus: What the hell has Angel been doing!

Ed: What, you got amnesia or something? *wiping mouth*

Wesley: Angel loses his soul whenever he experiences a moment of true happiness, turning into his alter ego Angelus.

All: *stare at Ed*

Spike: Usually it takes some good sex though.

Ed: *white*

Angelus: What the hell was I doing kissing a GUY?

Angelus: A midget at that!

Ed: I KEEL YOU. *attacks*

Angelus: *holds him at arms’ length* Riiiight…

Al: HEY! NOBODY KISSES MY BROTHER WITHOUT MY PERMISSION! *socks Angelus*

Angelus: WTF? A robot?

Authoress 1: AL. IS NOT. A ROBOT!!

Ed: He’s a suit of armor! Get it right!

Angelus: O_o

Angelus: By the way, where’s Buffy? I never got to kill her before.

Spike: Hands OFF, mate, she’s with the dancing demon!

Angelus: O_o

Angelus: Man, I’m outta here. *goes to do evil stuff*

Ed: Wait, you mean… he’s not gonna stalk me anymore?

Wesley: I think that’s a good assumption.

Ed: YEEEEEEEEEEEES!! *spaz dances*

Al: Have you had sugar again, niisan?

Ed: Maybe…

Envy: *turns into Xander*

Spike: How did you KNOW? *glomps*

All: . . .

Wesley: You do realize that’s Envy, right?

Spike: How did you know of my secret desires! *glomps*

Xander!Envy: What’s this I feel…?

Spike: *snuggles*

Xander!Envy: You’ll have to excuse us. *walks off*

All: *shudder*

Roy: I want a line…

Roy: MINISKIRTS! *looks at Wesley*

Wesley: *blushes and giggles*

Ed: *shields Al’s eyes*

Al: Huh?

Authoress 2: Hey, get back to the FLIPPING PLOT!!

Authoress 1: What plot?

Authoress 2: Fine. *goes to obsess over Maroon 5*

Spike: *runs up* Hey, Angelus just killed some bird named Winry!

Ed: *pause* YAY!

Spike: And he killed Rose!

Ed: *no hesitation* YAY!

Spike: AND HE’S ABOUT TO OVERFLOW THE WORLD WITH MILK!

Ed: . . .EVIL!

Roy: Looks like we need to get his soul back.

Wesley: But how?

Al: Niisan! The gate!

Ed: Yes! But what can we sacrifice…?

Al: Anyone got an extra arm, leg, or body?

All: *stare at Wesley*

Wesley: *whimper*

Ed: Wait! *walks off*

All: . . .

Ed: *returns, carrying a very wet and very traumatized Joss Whedon* He gave me indigestion.

Spike: So…

Al: *does alchemy thingy*

Gate: *appears*

Truth: *smoking* Whaddya want?

Ed: I’d like to trade this thing for Angel’s soul, please.

Truth: THAT soul? You can take it! It’s turning everything pink in here!

Joss Whedon: *is pulled into eternal damnation* Nooooooooooo!

Authoress 2: Not like he doesn’t DESERVE it!! *rabidly glares at him*

Angel’s soul: *floats*

Gate: *disappears*

Wesley: We need to call Willow now.

All: *take out cell phones*

Roy: I’ll call.

A few minutes later…

Willow: *bursts through random portal*

Angelus: Hiya.

Willow: *does magic thingy*

Angelus: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! *drops milk on Ed’s head*

Ed: NOOOOOOOOOO! *melts*

All: …

Angel: Hello dear! *pokes puddle o’ Ed*

Willow: *runs in terror*

Envy: Hey baby, why’d you leave right in the middle…?

Spike: *backs away*

Ed puddle: Help… help…

Angel: I’LL SAVE YOU SWEETIE!

Ed puddle: Nevermind!! Please!

To be continued...

GASP! A cliffhangar! Specifically designed to make you all hate me! WILL ED BE STUCK AS AN ANGEL-MOLESTED PUDDLE FOREVER? Is Spike actually enjoying all the Envysmex? WILL THERE BE NO END TO AL'S TRAUMA?

AND, WHY ARE THE SQUIRRELS TORTURING JOSS WHEDON?


Crossover: FMA/Ats/Suprise Fandom (this chapter only)
Genre: Crack/Fluff/Slash
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: More rather strong innuendo, language, traumatization of small, innocent children

Ed vs Angel: Chapter 9

Spike: Well, what are we going to do about ‘im? *gestures at Ed-puddle*

Ed-puddle: …sob…

Wesley: Well, maybe we could spill some non-dairy product on him.

Roy: That might work.

Envy: …why are we changing him back?

Angel: *has been sobbing in the background*

Ed-puddle: *twitches violently*

Angel: *sighs* I’ll go get something at the supermarket…

Angel walks away. Everyone else stares at the forlorn puddle.


Angel: *whistles as he walks to the Safeway*

Random Talent Agent: YOU! Whistling like a queer! Get over here!!

Angel: *dumbly looks at the man* M-me?

RTA: Do you know where I can find six people like you real quick?

Angel: *pause* Yeah!

A few minutes later…

Roy: *scooping Ed into a bucket* …you want us to do a childrens program?

Ed: STOP TOUCHING ME INNAPROPRIETELY!

Angel: Yeah, isn’t that a fabulous idea?

*silence*

Angel: Come on, it’ll be fun!

Envy: I do like traumatizing the young.

All reluctantly agree.

RTA: Well, that’s settled then!

RTA: First, I’ll need you all to have a look at this…

RTA: *pulls huge smile from behind his back*

*random flash of lightning*

Ed: H-hey, I’m not a puddle anymore! HOORAY!

Spike: BLOODY HELL! YOU’RE A WEE LITTLE PUPPET-MAN!

Envy: Oooh, so are you, Spike! I could just eat you up!

Ed: WHO ARE YOU CALLING A VERTICALLY-CHALLENGED CHILD’S PLAYTHING?

Spike: Bloody- WTF?

Roy: *stares at his cute, miniature uniform*

Angel: ZOMG!! NOT AGAIN!!

Envy: Please explain why I look like a miniature palm tree.

Angel: Well, you are a puppet…

Angel: AND A CUTE ONE AT THAT!

Envy: … *backs away slowly*

Wesley: *looks at himself* Dear god…

Roy: Yes, you are quite huggable.

Wes: *blushes* You really think so?

Roy: *smirk*

2: OMG! Puppet slash!!

1: The best kind.

RTA: Well, now you six are eternally bound to ME!!

RTA: BWAHAHAHA!

All: …

RTA: Yes, that was too much, wasn’t it.

RTA: NOW, DO MY BIDDING AND BRAINWASH INNOCENT CHILDREN!

The hapless puppets find themselves in front of a camera, getting their lines from a teleprompter.

Angel: *attempting to read while blinded by stage light* Howdy-do, kids! Guess what time it is?

Audience: SMILE TIME!!

Ed: I am your good buddy, Little Mister Ed!

Ed: HEY, WHO THE *bleep* DESIGNED THIS SCRIPT-

*gasps from audience*

Voice: Please stand by. *screen goes all colorful*

RTA: What was that? You read the script, no questions asked!!

Ed: I’m not SMALL!

All: Yes, yes you are.

Ed: *fumes*

Voice: We shall now resume regular programming.

Roy: And I’m Friendly Roy.

Envy: I’m the scenery.

Spike: And I’m William the Adorable.

Spike: WT*bleep*?!

RTA: *cracks whip off-screen*

Spike: I mean… smile, kids!

Wes: I’m Wesley the Cute.

Wes: O_o

Angel: And I’m the star… ANGIE!

Audience: *chanting* Angie, Angie, Angie!

Girl: I LOVE YOU ANGIE! *grabs for his underwear*

Angel: Hey! Don’t you know I prefer men?

Audience: *gasp*

RTA: *pulls Angel offstage*

RTA: What do you think you are doing?? Everybody knows you can’t tell kids such things on public television!

Angel: But you’re gonna brainwash them, right?

RTA: Point.

Ed: Hey! The audience is going nuts out here! Hurry it up!

RTA: *throws Angel back onstage*

Roy: Well, kids, it’s time for the Educational Segment of our show!

Audience: … *many small children scarred for life*

Envy: Ignore me, for I am a palm tree.

Angel: Well, Small Mister Ed, how was your day?

Ed: *twitchtwitchtwitchtwitchtwitch* Fine.

Angel: Ooh, look, a palm tree! I’ll bet William planted it. He just loves palm trees!

Ed: Are you aware of all the sexual implications you just made?

RTA: *smacks forehead*

Angel: Yeah, DUH!

Envy: Heheheheheheh…

Spike: *twitch*

Envy: Come here and ‘plant’ me, William~

Spike: Yes, just let me get my ‘gardening tools’.

Envy: Oooh, kinky.

Audience: *stare*

Wesley: Er-hem! Hello, Angie.

Angel: Hi, Wesley! Ed and I were just watching William ‘plant’ that palm tree.

Wesley: Yes, he just loves palm trees!

Ed: I wasn’t planning on watching.

Roy: Gay porn for kids…?

2: THE REVOLUTION OF TELEVISION!

1: LET US WATCH IT AS A FAMILY!

Wesley: Roy, shall we help William ‘plant’ the tree?

Roy: Hmm. Why not?

RTA: *curls up into a fetal position*

RTA: *thinking* I mean, I do brainwash the kids, but this is just a NIGHTMARE!

Kid in audience: Look at that funny man over there!

RTA: Shit.

RTA: I mean

RTA: *makes that annoying bleep sound*

Other kid in audience: Let’s jump him!

Audience: YAAAY! *attack RTA*

Puppets: *stare*

Envy: Aww, I was looking forward to being ‘planted’.

Envy: It’s just not as fun without millions of innocent children watching you.

All: *twitch*

Al: *wonders where he disappeared too*

Wrath: *does too*

Ed: Now would be a good time to figure out how to de-puppetize ourselves.

Wes: Right.

Roy: I don’t know, you are rather huggable…

Wes: *blushblush*

Roy: *smirk*

Angel: And I did prefer Angie…

Envy: I think it’s time we changed back. Right now.

Ed: *nodnodnod*

Spike: Yes, before I ‘plant’ you.

Envy: Oh, you can still ‘plant’ me.

Random Glowing Figure appears

RGF: It is I…

Toulousse: Toulousse le Trec!

1: -_-

2: Couldn’t help the MR references

Angel: *to Toulousse* AWW! You’re so adorable!

2: *cough* Small people *cough*

Ed: Why is it people randomly appear so much around here…?

Wes: Beats me…

1: *cough*

2: *whistles*

Toulousse: I have the power… OF ABSINTHE.

Roy: Ooh, liquor.

Spike: All right!

Envy: It’s green!

Wes: Will it help turn us back into humans?

Toulousse: I have no idea.

Envy: But it’s GREEN!

Spike: So, obviously, it must work.

Toulousse: Open wide!

The little man pours absinthe into all of our *cough* heroes’ mouths.

Ed: But I’m und- *glug*

The Green Absinthe Fairy: Hello, I’m the green fairy!

The Green Fairy magically turns them all back the way they were, then disappears.

Ed: …NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Ed: I’m a *bleepin* puddle again!


OMG! Ed remains a puddle? WILL HE EVER DE-LIQUIFY FROM THE MILK'S HORRIFIC EFFECTS? And, OMG, random Moulin Rouge crossovers?? Al and Wrath are in some altrenate dimension? WILL THEY SCAR THIS NATION'S CHILDREN AND POLITICAL FIGURES FOR LIFE?

And, HOW WILL THE SQUIRRELS TAKE OVER THE EARTH?
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